Warning: Contents Under Pressure March 19, 2010

This is a rant I’ve had brewing for a while and it kind of came to a head yesterday in my… well… in my head. I got quite a shock yesterday when I was cruising Facebook and there was some really hateful speech on a friend’s page about racial issues. Four-letter words and foul epithets I thought only people of generations past used. My friend was describing a strange dream she’d had where she was driving down the road and a couple of white cops pulled her over and told her in no uncertain (or polite) terms that there would be no <n-word>s in their county. She wondered if it meant it was time for her to move. There were two comments, one of which used a four letter word and an offensive pejorative for white people. The other comment said she needed to stop eating white foods like milk, tortillas, & crackers, implying they were somehow evil because of their color (note: the commenter was clearly joking, but still… I found it offensive and inappropriate). The whole exchange really bothered me and for hours I could hardly keep it off my mind (a chattering five-year-old did help some).

My friend who posted the dream is an intelligent, loving, proud black woman with one of the most contagious smiles I’ve seen and I’d love to get to know her better; we just never seem to find the time. The fact that racial issues–and that kind of racial issues (the kind I thought died long ago)– are so present in her mind that she’s had a dream where someone would speak to her in such a disparaging and inappropriate way… I don’t know what to say… it just really left me unsettled. On top of that, I’d expected to see comments telling my friend not to worry or asking if she’d had some run-ins with bigots lately… but to find one angry and report-able comment and another that implied all white things needed avoiding due to some kind of taint? Really?! Is this where we’re at? STILL??? It makes me unspeakably sad. Angry. Disappointed. Shouldn’t we be beyond this by now?

I’m not so naive as to believe that there isn’t racial injustice. I know there are ignoramuses out there who insist we’d all be better off if we were just one color, one culture, all united in hatred against anything different. But they’re wrong and I think the majority know that.

It’s high time for us to move past black, white, hispanic, etc. It’s even time to stop pretending we’re all the same and have no differences. My friend with the strange dream knows black and white are different and she embraces the unique culture that is found in black communities. There are some really positive things in the black community that I think we as white people could learn from… IF we would stop pretending we’re all cut with the same cookie cutter, just different colored dough. It’s not the case! I’m glad that for the most part, we’ve moved beyond seeing our differences as a negative, but we’ve moved on to pretending they’re not there. That’s not healthy either. That’s ostrich behavior (you know… burying your head in the sand). We are different. We are each endowed with unique qualities and strengths. When will we learn to share them? When will we learn to learn from each other? When will we learn that God knew what He was doing when He made different cultures, races, and languages? At the tower of Babel (the Biblical account of the origin of different languages), God made it plain that He didn’t want us all to be the same; didn’t want us all to be in one place, all homogenous. He wanted us spread out, embracing our uniqueness. What is it going to take for that to happen today?

It’s time. It’s time to move past “can’t we all just get along” to appreciating, embracing, enjoying, learning from each other. The only way I can see to do that is to talk about it. Talk about our differences. Share them. Ask about them. On that note, I just have to give a shout out to my friend Gabryl, another proud black woman I’m glad to know. I grew up in the suburbs of Denver and never had much interaction with people outside my race. When we moved here to Oklahoma, I was clueless about a lot of things to do with black culture. Gabryl has always been there for me to ask whatever question I want to ask. She never looks down on me, gets offended or shames me for wanting to know even though I’m pretty sure some of my questions have sounded kinda dumb. I love that we have different backgrounds that we can share– LOVE it. It’s because of people like Gabryl that I think we really can do this thing! We really can do more than just get along; do more than just tolerate each other.

So here’s my suggestion… put on a courageous face and ask a question you’ve always wanted to know of someone who’s of a different race. Be gentle. This is a new thing for a lot of people. Start with something like “You know, I’ve always been curious, but never been brave enough to ask…” Take one step. Make the world a little better with one step at a time. Move us in the right direction.

Note: I hope I haven’t offended by saying “black” rather than using the supposedly PC term “African American.” I don’t like that term. I don’t think it’s accurate and I don’t think it helps. Not all black people are descended from Africa and not all Africans are black (did you know Charlize Theron is African?). If we’re going to embrace our differences, let’s figure out what they are rather than assume we know.

Drinking from my saucer… still March 15, 2010

This morning, the kids were clamoring for breakfast and my brain just about short-circuited when I saw we had no cereal. This is what I threw together for them and it was a hit, so I’m writing it down before I forget it…

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Hot Banana Breakfast

2 cups cooked whole grain (quinoa is what I had, but I’m thinking brown rice would work well too)
2 bananas, mashed
milk
sweetener to taste (I used sugar, but wanted to use honey… too bad we were out)

Put the cooked grains in a medium saucepan and pour milk on till it comes to the top of the grains. Dump the rest in and heat until it’s thickened just a bit. Makes about 4 servings

Voila! Quick, easy, cheap, hot, healthy whole grain breakfast.

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While I’m at it, I might as well post a bit about life ’cause there’s some cool stuff happening.

I posted a bit ago (here) about how we’re starting in on Dave Ramsey’s Financial Peace University and also about our car wreck. At first when we wrecked, I knew Murphy had struck. Here we are just getting our financial lives together and we have a big time financial crisis… one that our mere $1000 emergency fund wouldn’t cover. I figured our hopes of financial peace were shot, but they’re not kidding when they say God works in mysterious ways. Because of our car insurance and gap insurance, our van will be paid off. It was our biggest debt and now it’ll be gone! Dave Ramsey advises buying a beater of a car that you can pay cash for and not have a car payment. Seemed impossible, but because of our tax return coming, we’ll be able to do that. That means no car payment! Which means extra money to chuck at debt! Which means we’ll be out of debt 2 years earlier than we’d thought. Additionally, the van we’re hoping to buy is in Jeremy’s home town… and close-ish to the baby swing I loaned to my sister. Those things don’t ship well and no one is planning a trip out here. If we buy the van out there, Jeremy can fly to CO (maybe me too! Probably not… don’t think you can fly in your 3rd trimester), grab the swing from my sister and bring it home in the new-to-us van. So check this out… our car wreck is resulting in less debt, getting out of debt sooner, and possibly even getting my swing back in time to set up for Quacho. Who’d’a thunk it?

Some more cool stuff happening:

• For a while now, I’ve wanted to get a blog started that’s just for Christian women. New posts daily from different ladies, room for discussions, a way to connect with others. It’s up! It’s happening! I’m soooo excited about the success it’s seen already. Drop by when you get a chance… Come Fill Your Cup
• Something else I’ve wanted to see happen for a long time is a retreat for preachers’ & leaders’ wives like Workshop in the Word. It would be scripture, scripture, scripture– not fluff. We would go through a book of the Bible verse by verse and learn how to teach it to others (Bible classes and evangelistic applications).  This project is way too big for me by myself. I don’t even know where to begin, but now I have a very capable cohort and it’s happening! I think it’s going to be even better than I have envisioned.
• I am still able to do Tae Kwon Do even this far along (35 weeks)! Seriously modified, sure. No kicks above mid-level. No spinning kicks or back fists or anything else spinning (didn’t realize how exhausting those are!!). The warm-up/ cardio at the beginning is seriously modified too. No sit-ups. No leg lifts past 45 degrees. Push-ups must be girly (not that I can do the others anyway). No planks. BUT… the working out regularly, the stretching, and some of the exercises have been really helpful and I credit TKD with making this my easiest, healthiest pregnancy.
• My doctor (Rita Sanders, D.O.) has been wonderful. She has six kids herself and is an athlete, so when she says I can keep up my physical activities and tells me what I can and can’t do, I trust her. She and I kinda went rounds when I was pregnant with the twins and at their delivery, but now that we got that out of our systems, we have a good dr-patient relationship and I’m really glad I’ve stuck with her. We see eye-to-eye on most things and because I know her philosophy, I know what to expect. Didn’t even have to tell her I don’t want an epidural… she already knew and it doesn’t bug her a bit.

To sum it up, life is good and getting better all the time. I’m drinking from the saucer ’cause my cup has overflowed.

Well, duh! March 12, 2010

Here’s a series of tips I’m calling “Well, duh!” because when I heard them, I thought “Well, duh! Why didn’t I think of that?” Some of the tips are mine and I did think of them, but most of them come from others. Shared wisdom is wonderful, isn’t it? (And by the way, please share YOUR bits of wisdom by leaving your own “well, duh!” tip in the comments.Thanks! )

Measuring in the kitchen:

When measuring things in a glass or otherwise see-through measure, turn the handle around to the left. The markings will be on the opposite side and you can easily see them from above without having to bend down, crank your neck and possibly make yourself look just a bit insane. It’s a simple way to reduce one cause of that comment, “Mommy? What are you doing?” True, your measurement might be off by a hair, but I find it doesn’t really matter. Also, if you measure a little below the line, it’s more accurate.
Credit goes to: My mommy. As a lefty, this is her normal mode of measuring and I grew up thinking this is how all people measure. Turns out, it’s just how some brilliant people measure.

Keep a measuring cup in the dry goods you use most (like flour, sugar, etc.). Half a cup seems like the easiest way to go. If you have to measure a full cup, it’s just two; if you have to measure a quarter cup, it’s easy to eyeball half the measuring cup.
Credit goes to: My mother did it. My grandmother did it. My mother-in-law did it. I read it on a blog or two. I suspect Noah’s wife started this one.

To quickly and easily level off a measuring cup/ spoon, use the back of a butter knife or the handle of some other flatware. For most things, I just don’t bother, but for leavenings, I do. For the longest time, I couldn’t figure out why my bread kept coming out more like a brick than like food. Turns out I was adding too much yeast. I’d measure the yeast and shake it till it looked level, but when I started scraping the top off with a knife, I found I’d been adding too much. Apparently enough to make my bread rise too high then fall. With the proper measurement, my bread started coming out right. Side tip on yeast: when a recipe calls for one packet, that’s 2 1/4 tsp of yeast. Save money by buying containers of yeast instead of packets.
Credit goes to: Mom and Betty Crocker. Mom taught me this growing up, but I’d forgotten it until Betty reminded me.

Leftovers/ reusing containers

Scribble on the containers you’re reusing. I’m one of those pack rats thrifty people who saves the sour cream, yogurt, and other miscellaneous containers. The trouble was I’d stick the evening’s leftovers in one of these reused containers and completely forget about them because they looked like a tub of sour cream or yogurt or whatever. So, I whipped out my trusty Sharpie marker and now I scribble on all those saved containers. I may not know what’s in it right off, but curiosity gets me and I open it just to find out what it is.
Credit goes to: Short-term memory loss associated with lack of sleep and young children underfoot.

Here’s a tip I haven’t actually employed yet, but want to… Put a small dry erase board on the fridge and write what leftovers are in there as you put them in. I think I’ll put how many servings there are too.
Credit goes to: Umm… I don’t remember. Some lady who commented on some blog or other. Everyday Cheapskate maybe? Dunno.

Write directly on the container what it is you’re saving. Don’t be afraid to use that Sharpie marker. A little bit of rubbing alcohol on a cotton ball takes it right off of glass containers and plastic containers too (except the textured kind). It’s probably still best to try it on the bottom or something before going crazy just to be sure… I’ve been known to make mistakes before.
Credit goes to: my inability to remember to buy freezer tape or masking tape or apparently any other kind of tape since we’re also out of scotch tape & packing tape.

I love to reuse bottles and other containers for canisters for various things. We buy various things in bulk and I don’t want to have a zillion obnoxious bags hanging around in my pantry, so I stick the foods in reused containers. My favorites are applesauce jars and Mason jars. Sometimes I’ll even pay a little extra for something I need because it’s in a container I like (the popcorn below is in a cornstarch container I paid extra for). I write all the most important info right on the container and sometimes decorate it a bit. Not an artist, but it’s kinda fun to pretend.
Credit goes to: I’m too cheap to shell out for nicer containers.

Do you have some “well, duh!” tips to share? I’d love to hear them, so leave a comment if you would be so kind! Thanks.

Saturday March 9, 2010

Bad news:
We were headed to the zoo, but got this instead…

We were all seat-belted and/ or in car seats, so no one was seriously hurt. Isaiah got the worst of it. He was in a captain’s seat behind the driver. The seat detached from the floor (!!!) and slammed him up against the back of the driver’s seat. His big toe was smashed between the seats and it’s broken. He doesn’t want to walk on it (and shouldn’t for about 10 more days). My wrist is sprained, but other than that, we’re all just bumped and bruised.

Our friend who is the pulpit preacher at the Owasso church of Christ, came to pick us up (since we couldn’t seem to get the van started for some reason). His broad smile sure was a sight for sore eyes. The kids and I had been hanging out in the back of the ambulance for at least 45 minutes. The kids were feeling understandably cuddly, a bit nervous and not really enjoying the ambulance in comparison with the anticipated zoo. When our friend showed up at the back door, he had just exactly the right words: “I’ve got donuts!” Jaden’s face lit up and out the back he went into the arms of our friend. He took Isaac too, a paramedic took Isaiah, I scrambled my pregnant self out and we headed off to the waiting church van. Jeremy and one of the paramedics finagled the car seats out of our van and we were on the road again. We were so relieved to have family (spiritual family, that is) close by and able to help. The thoughtfulness of the donuts was just over the top and true to his style. He has a genuine servant’s heart, is humble, caring, loving and manages to be one of the funniest people I’ve ever met, too. And a sidenote: when I think of women who exemplify the noble woman of Proverbs 31:10-31, his wife is one of the first ladies I think of.

No doubt, it wasn’t a good day, but it could have been much much MUCH worse. We’re all fine. The other people involved in the wreck are fine. Now we’re just cleaning up the financial and transportational mess this causes. I get the feeling, though, that it’s all going to work out. Though Romans 8:28 is NOT talking about this world (let me make that clear!), I have a hunch that somehow this is going to work out in this world and for the ultimate good.

One more piece of bad news, then moving on. I would just leave it here except that this prayer request is important. Not long after our crash, there was a fatal hit and run in the same area. Please pray for the victim’s family and that the other driver is found.

Good news:
Since we had an afternoon free, we also got… 

 

A NEW FAUCET!!

And looky!!
It’s a sprayer!!
It stretches way out too!

Confession #1: I have a lot more pictures (5 more) I was going to post, but decided maybe that was a little too crazy. There’s one of how it swings to the right. One which demonstrates its swing to the left. There’s one of it not spraying, but aptly pouring a nice fat flow of water. There aren’t any of me kissing it, but there might be if I could figure out how to hold the camera like that.

Anyway, I was particularly pleased that my sweet hubby installed it for me and we didn’t have to pay $99 for Lowes to do it. The old one was leaking and starting to really damage the wood under the sink. The new faucet had been sitting in its box taunting Jeremy for a couple of weeks, but he showed it who was boss. It looks great and almost makes dishwashing a treat. Almost. Not quite, but almost.

Confession #2: I had to wait till today to take pictures of the faucet because up till about 10:45 this morning, the sink was too nasty to photograph. I’m talking brown and nasty. It’s shining now, though! I think even FlyLady would be proud of my shiny sink.

 

 

It took a budget March 6, 2010

We’re almost 4 weeks into Dave Ramsey’s Financial Peace University (FPU). It’s going really well and we’re already on to baby step #2. Our homework this week is to do a full-blown budget and lay out what comes out of what paycheck. Totally essential. Totally helpful. Totally NOT fun. We didn’t argue or fuss at each other like Dave warns about. That wasn’t it at all. It’s just that we’re used to a very loose concept of a budget. Jeremy gets paid, we pull out offering, get online and pay bills, then spend whatever is left. There’s no consideration for the fact our car will one day die, that next week there’s more bills than paycheck (’cause every bill is due THAT week), no thought given to saving. It means that when we look down and see that Jaden’s pants are now capris and decide he just can’t pull that look off (not that many people can), either we don’t eat that week or we dig a financial hole & get him some new pants.

This new budgeting thing… well… now there’s just no room for eating out because I don’t feel like cooking, for going to the movies on a whim or flying off to Rio for dessert (okay… so some of that is just fantasy… Movies on a whim? Who does that?). And my chocolate budget is slim. Bonus, though: I actually have a knitting budget.

It’s gonna be good. I know it will. I just have to get used to this whole idea of being an adult and being responsible. You’d think three kids, a husband & a mortgage would do the trick to convince me I am actually an adult… but nope. It took a budget.

The finish line… like it or lump it March 1, 2010

Okay… remember how I thought maybe my line up for the Ravelympics/ Knitting Olympics was possibly crazy ambitious? Turns out it was more than a little crazy ambitious. Downright straight jacket nutty. Here’s what I actually accomplished…
Still, I feel really good about my effort. I knit at every reasonable opportunity and have become quite attached to this whole knitting thing, which was part of my goal. Seems a little crazy to *try* to become attached to a hobby– either you are or you aren’t. Still, I wanted to become attached because I know it’s good for me. It’s beneficial for lots of reasons that I could go into now, but think I’ll save for another post since it’s… Wow. 2:30 am. Anyway, I’m pleased with my efforts and I’m pleased with the results. For me to actually finish any project always seems like a major deal, but to start AND finish in 17 days?! I’m thrilled.